


All Light Leaves A Shadow

by xocotzin



Series: Naruto x Reader fics [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Aged up characters, Angst, Arguments, Crying, Emotional, F/M, Female Reader, Fluff, Get togethers, Happy Ending, Hugs, I MEAN TECHNICALLY, Insecurity, Jealousy, Love, Misunderstandings, PWP, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Smut, Teasing, everything is soft in the end, friends that are trying their best, hand holding, happy endings!, inadequacy, insecure Naruto, medium brewed angst, no beta we die like men, reader is friends with Neji and Shikamaru, sassy characters, so much love and support, soft shit man, we love and respect neji hyuga in this house, yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-09 15:39:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19478929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xocotzin/pseuds/xocotzin
Summary: Naruto is a doting boyfriend that loves you more than anything in the world.Sometimes you forget that despite being a literal sun, he has his own issues and insecurities too.





	All Light Leaves A Shadow

**Author's Note:**

> Completely unrelated but bc naruto is a jinchuriki does kurama like,,, does he watch? Does he feel that shit? Is that a thing?  
> Anyway hope you guys enjoy (this ended up longer than I anticipated lol)  
> Note: everyone is like,, 19/20 in this

You hummed quietly to yourself, looking at your outfit in the mirror with a smile on your face; you were wearing a pale blue strapless shirt with a white skater skirt. It hugged your body just right and was super comfortable. Today you were going on a little date with Naruto and you wanted to look nice without going too overboard. 

After you guys were to grab lunch, you were going to spend time with your friends. None of you had time to get together and fully relax for quite some time with all of the hectic missions and responsibilities that came with being higher ranking ninjas. Giddily you pranced into your living room and double checked your makeup in your compact mirror. You didn’t always get to look so nice, usually you were loaded down with gear and your normal ninja outfit. This looked nothing like it and the stark contrast made you smile. Today was going to be great, it was already a beautiful day outside and you couldn’t wait to see your loving boyfriend. 

You tucked astray strand of (h/c) hair behind your ear, pulled on a pair of flats and started your walk to Ichiraku Ramen. There was a slight bounce in your step as you walked down the street, admiring the blue skies and fluffy clouds above you. There were a bunch of children running around and playing with one another, shrieking with delight as the zoomed past you. You giggled as you watched them go. 

“(Y/N)-chan!” 

You looked around, instantly recognizing the voice but didn’t see your boyfriend anywhere. A pair of arms wrapped around you and squeezed, lifting you slightly

“Ah, Naruto!” you laughed and he placed you down gently, giving you a quick peck on the cheek. The heat of his body pleasantly warming your back, he leaned forward close to your ear and whispered, “You look beautiful”

A light blush bloomed as you bit back a grin

He fell into step beside you and weaved your fingers together, giving your connected knuckles a quick kiss. You moved in closer and kissed his cheek in return

“I missed you” his smile was brighter than the summer sun above you two

“Mm I missed you more” You scrunched your nose at him playfully

You continued the affectionate back and forth until you made it to your destination. Lunch was quite nice. The two of you sat close together talking softly. Naruto would loop his pinkie with yours whenever he gets the chance, he was always so gentle and loved to show his love for you whenever the situation allowed him to. He was always his bright and bubbly self when he was with you but you could tell that he was always a little calmer when he was by your side. You had been a little concerned about this in the beginning of your relationship but you’d grown to notice that all of the energy he would randomly expel was funneled into watching and admiring you while trying to shower you with his love and devotion. It made you blush every time you thought about it. 

Before you knew it the two of you had finished your meal and it was a little past the time you were supposed to meet up with both of your friends at Shikamaru’s house. Luckily it wasn’t too far off so you and Naruto paid, thanked the chef and walked over hand in hand.

You knocked on the door and heard a scuttling of feet and muffled voices, music drifting quietly from behind the closed door.

“(Y/N)! It feels like it’s been forever!” Ino was the one to throw open the door; the girl hugged you and you reciprocated her energy

“It’s so great to see you again too!” you hugged her back and you broke apart

“Naruto, you better be treating her well. She deserves only _the best_ you know!” she poked his chest playfully. She tilted her head slightly when he didn’t respond right away

He blinked, slightly shocked as he was brought back from wherever his mind was, “Ah, I try my best!” he smiled but it looked a little tighter around the edges of his eyes

The three of you walked further into the house and into the living room and were greeted with a chorus of greetings (you were vaguely surprised to see that Sasuke had actually shown up to one of your friend group’s gatherings, but it was refreshing to see how happy Sakura was that he was there with her.)

Hugs and brief words were exchanged with everyone before the two of you sat on the ground with the rest of the group. Some of them were playing card games, others chatting and some drinking. 

“This is nice” you lean your head on Naruto’s shoulder and he gave your hand a squeeze. Choji was talking with Rock Lee about training, Sakura and Ino were playing a game with Sasuke and Kiba, Akamaru taking up the entire loveseat as he napped. Close by Shino, Sai and Hinata were talking but you couldn’t hear what they were saying… they’re quite an interesting trio you thought to yourself. Everyone else was milling around the couch, occasionally coming in and out of the kitchen.

“Naruto! Come over here for a second” Sakura had waved him over

“Okay, okay” he laughed, “I’ll be right back” he smiled and gave you another kiss on the cheek

“Ew cooties.” 

“Shut up Shikamaru” you kicked his leg as he took Naruto’s place next to you

“Whatever I’m your favorite.” he shoved your shoulder

“See, that can be argued, Neji is my favorite right now” you tapped your chin in faux concentration

Said man turned to face the two of you from his place on the couch next to you, his hair falling over the armrest as he rested his chin on his hand, “I heard my name?”

“Ugh you dramatic bitch. Fuck you and your hair.” Shikamaru patted at his own puffy ponytail

“You’re just jealous because your hair makes you look like a pineapple.” you flicked his head and turned to Neji “Anyway, yes, I said you were my favorite between you and Shikamaru”

“Oh, well that’s good to hear-” he swiveled to face the girl sitting next to him whose hands were hovering over his head, locks of his hair spilling from her hands, “Jesus christ Tenten _I said no buns._ ” 

“Come on you coward they would look phenomenal on you!”

You and Shikamaru were laughing as the two bickered

Somewhere in the background you heard Naruto and Kiba started arguing about the logistics of being hokage, Sasuke throwing in his own comments every now and then (that only seemed to fuel them further). The energy in the room was nice, everyone was happy to be hanging out together.

Shikamaru put his elbow on your shoulder and whispered to you, “Do you think we could convince Tenten to give Neji double braids?”

You let out a loud snort and covered your mouth, your shoulders shaking 

“Oh my god _yes_ ” you all but wheezed

Naruto felt his skin prickle faintly as he saw from the corner of his eyes’ line of sight, he was filled with warmth at how your laughter seeped the room with warmth, but something didn’t sit right. He brushed it off and continued with his conversation, trying his best to pay attention and not watch you the entire time like he desperately wanted to.

You’d always been closer to Neji and Shikamaru than the rest, they were all super nice but you just got a long with them better. Your own team wasn’t exactly close. You could all work together flawlessly and you cared about each other's physical well being enough to always pull off missions quickly and efficiently, but that was the extent of your relationship with them. It didn’t really matter to you anyway, growing up you had always been close to Shikamaru, you mothers were friends after all so you were always together when you were little. Later on it took some time but you got closer to Neji, when he finally opened up to you as a friend you found out that he was really funny and honestly pretty sassy. As you continued to get older your circle of friends only grew and you found yourself hanging out with all of them whenever you could. It was nice to have more people you knew you could rely on, they all did so much for you and you them. 

Naruto was now busy arguing with Sasuke about... something. You’d lost track of what they were talking about a while ago when you had gotten roped into a conversation with Tenten and Shikamaru trying to convince Neji to let Tenten do his hair. You were sitting on the arm of the couch to Neji’s left while Tenten sat to his right, Shikamaru lingering somewhere in between.

Maybe it was the hand that landed goodnaturedly a little _too_ high on your skirt clad thigh or the way you shook Neji’s shoulders lightly and leaned in a little _too_ close but Naruto’s jaw snapped shut and suddenly he couldn’t hear what his friends were saying. All he saw was the way Neji yielded to you and how you threw up your arms in triumph, a blush raising high on his cheeks as you and Tenten began to braid opposite sides of his head. Your deft fingers weaving his hair, lightly brushing the sides of his face and cheek as you went. Neji’s eyes lulling shut as you combed through his hair with those soft, careful digits. Shikamaru put his head on your shoulder to watch your progress. His mouth opened and he said something but Naruto couldn’t quite hear it. You shifted your head slightly to reply but your eyes remained on the hair in your hands. Neither of you seemed to notice how close your faces were, and if you did you didn’t seem to care. It wasn’t necessarily the proximity that bothered him, it was the way you two seemed to fit together so perfectly with one another. It was how relaxed the two of you were, how natural it looked, how normal it looked to see you two together. The low hum of your voices harmonizing as you spoke. The image fit perfectly. Something swirled in a torrent deep inside of him.

_Inadequacy._

_Undeserving._

_Scared._

The last one was popping up quite a bit more than the others, it felt like there was something lodged in his throat.

Without really thinking he walked away from his friends mid conversation and went to your group, ignoring the questioning calls behind him.

“Hey (Y/N), let's head out?” he smiled. It was more of a statement than a question and that immediately turned something inside of you. He hated being the first one to leave and _you knew that_.

Tenten had stopped braiding Neji’s hair, noticing something was off

“I want to stay a little longer.” you countered, shooting him a smile and continued what you were doing, you tugged Neji’s hair a little harder than before. He winced you gasped and leaned forward so you were eye level, “Ah! I’m so sorry!” you pat the side of his head

“It’s fine-” he waved off your concern

“I’m gonna go ahead and,” he tilted his head toward the door 

“Aw come on Naruto, don’t be a drag were having fun” he clapped his shoulder

Naruto gave him a look and Shikamaru put his hands up, “Damn alright, my bad.”

Naruto had already begun walked to the door. He felt sick. But who was he to make you leave when you didn’t want to?

“O-kay?” You slowly stood up, seeing the obvious shift in your boyfriend. Neji’s hair fell from your fingers in silky strands as you started to move away, “I guess we’re gonna be leaving then!” you gave them all a bright smile to hide the vague annoyance that settled in your body. 

“(Y/N) are you sure?” Tenten shifted uncomfortably in her seat

“I’ll be fine, it’s all good!” you kept the happy façade bright 

You gave Neji, Shikamaru and Tenten a hug and waved at the rest. Walking faster than him, you grabbed Naruto’s wrist and walked out the door

“Well that was kind of awkward…” Choji scratched his head and the others mumbled their agreement.

Shikamaru just stared at the now closed door, eyebrow raised.

Outside you pulled Naruto for a couple seconds before dropping his wrist and walking in front of him; it was a bit later into the day, the sun edging closer to the west. You were trying to figure out why he was acting like he was. Something was wrong and for some reason it was pissing you off.

Both of you headed back to your apartment without question. The silence that hung felt weighted as you walked, the cool breeze couldn’t stifle the tension building in you. 

When you reached your door, you opened it and held it for him; your mind was flicking through the many options of what you could possibly say to start this conversation. Every second of his silence was a steady drip into the vial of your anger and it was close to spilling over. As soon as you stepped over the threshold you closed the door with a little more force than necessary

“What’s wrong?” you walked up to him, flicking on a single light, making it easier to see in the slight dimness of the room.

“Nothing’s wrong.” he leaned against your kitchen counter

“We both know that’s not true. Why did we leave? Why are you being so weird?”

“(Y/N), its nothing, okay?”

“Stop lying to me.” your tone was harsh and straight to the point. It easily pierced through whatever walls he was trying to build.

He mumbled something but you only heard a garbled mash of words that was trailed by “...a um thing?”

“What?” You were losing your patience

He huffed, losing his composure as his words came out quickly, “ _Do you and Shikamaru have a thing?”_ he paused, “Do you have feelings for him?”

“Do we- _You think we have a ‘thing’ Naruto_ ? You think I’m _with_ him despite the fact that you and I are _literally dating?”_ you were fuming

“I don’t know.” he snapped, although his words were shaky. His arms wrapped around himself in the guise of crossing his arms

“Do you think that I would _ever_ cheat on you? Is that how little you think of me? Not even as your girlfriend but as a _person?_ ” you felt rage and betrayal boiling in your gut

“ _What? No, never I_ -” he sighed, obviously frustrated as he ran his fingers through his hair 

A heavy silence passed

“ _Then what is it Naruto?_ ” You crossed your arms, lips pursed, “What could it possibly be?”

“You’re-” He limply waved his arms towards you "you’re this amazing, stunningly beautiful woman. You’re smart and funny and just _so perfect_. I don’t deserve someone like you, with all your patience and how nice you are I just…” 

His eyebrows were furrowed and he was just staring at his hands now, “You deserve to be with people like Neji and Shikamaru. He’s talented and objectively gorgeous, you two go way back and Shikamaru is smart like you. You two can talk strategy so fast I love seeing your brain work so quickly but I can’t keep up with you like he can. Sasuke is on an entirely different level and hell, you specialise in taijutsu and we all know that Neji and Lee are worlds better than I ever could be. There are so many people that would suit you better than me. People that are smarter, wittier, faster and better looking. They all have so much potential and you do to, but I-” his voice cracked “I’m just… I'm just me.”

His tone got bitter and defeated, “The kid that got the Nine-Tails shoved up his ass and _somehow_ gets into deep shit at every turn. _Nobody wants me_."

The air was thick and you felt like you were drowning in the weight of his words. Your head started to spin a bit.

“I’m not saying that you ever would, but if you did” he paused, his head hanging as he refused to look at you, “I wouldn’t blame you, you know?” he let out a humorless laugh that sounded strangely wet, “Not even a little.”

You couldn't help but stand there and stare at him in utter shock, that was the last thing you expected him to say. His chest heaved with the effort it took him to say his piece. Naruto clenched his jaw shut, the muscles fluttering from the strain. He took a couple steps past you and collapsed onto your couch. You followed him and immediately kneeled down in front of him

Your chest ached and burned as your hands skittered over his trembling arms, you couldn't see his face. His fists were balled up clawing at his pants, shoulders curling in on himself. 

Weight settled in the base of your stomach and twirled itself up and around your trachea with strong and spindly fingers.

"What-" your voice cracked and you swallowed it down "what are you talking about?" Your hands finally settled on his cheeks cupping his cheeks and tilting it gently so that he would look at you

His lips were pulled taut in a frown, eyebrows knit together, eyelashes thick and heavy with fresh tears. The red rimming his eyes and splotching his cheeks made his blue eyes look bolder and they pierced through your heart. 

"You know what I mean (y/n)." His words fell between the two of you, he sounded tired, defeated.

"No, I don't" you scooted yourself forward so that you were further between his legs now, your thumbs trying to swipe away the inundation of tears that coated his cheeks. "I don't know at _all_ and it's scaring me"

He let out a shaky breath and let his head lean into your hands.

Time passed as the two of you stayed in each others presence in your apartment. The sun had long since set and the remaining light permitting you to see one another came from the dim bulb above your kitchen counter and the soft beams from the moon. 

You continued to brush the tears away and gently knead the back of Naruto's neck with your remaining fingers.

Pulling him towards yourself slowly, you pressed a long kiss to his tear slick lips, the salt tingling on your own as you began to pepper his jaw and his entire face. You wanted to shower him in affection, and you couldn't do that properly from this angle. Pushing forward, you crawled onto the couch, straddling his legs as you continued the onslaught of slow, methodical kisses.

It took a few more kisses to his lips until the blonde began to reciprocate, his arms that hung by his sides found their way around your waist. You snaked your hands under the front of his shirt and continued up, the fabric bunching around your wrists until he lifted his arms and you could fully pull the cloth off of him. Once you tossed his shirt to the side you did the same with your own, exposing your simple white bra. When you looked back towards Naruto, his eyes were still glossy and it burned deep in your heart.

Wrapping your arms around his neck you pulled him closer so that his head fell into the crook of your neck

" _I do_ " You whispered against his ear, sending shivers down his spine

"What?" He shifted his head so he could properly look at you, confusion painting his features

"You said that nobody wants you. Well, I want you. I love you so much, I always have and I always will." It was your turn to have those burning tears stream down your face and falling onto your exposed skin.

Before anymore words could be exchanged you began to kiss him once more, grinding your hips against his painstakingly slow, your skirt pooling around your thighs. Naruto kneaded your legs, trailing his hand from your knees to under your skirt clutching your thighs as they circled the increasing hardness between his legs. His hands were scorching as they left trails of sparks and heat everywhere skin met skin. Short breaths and quiet moans spilt from each of your mouths, each kiss felt vaguely tacky from the mixture of drying tears and fresh fallen ones.

The blush on your cheeks from crying grew bolder with the heat of arousal, you let your head rest on his shoulder as you shifted back and began to fumble with the button and zipper holding his pants in place. The pairing of harsh sucking and light kisses on your sensitive neck were driving you crazy, making your current task even harder to complete.

With a satisfied huff and the flash of a slight grin you were able to pop open the garment and pushed them back as far as you could.

A dark spot grew at the peak of the tent in his underwear.

You grazed your fingers over him, leaning forward to nibble at his ear as he shook his pants the rest of the way off his legs, a quiet moan rumbled from his chest as he rolled his hips into your touch, looking for more than just the fleeting brush of fingertips. 

The quick rise and fall of his breathing made your heart beat faster. You moved your hands up and traced them under the band of his underwear and removed them all together with the help of his lifted hips. He looked to the side, seemingly embarrassed. Whether it was from the red strain of his bordering painful erectness or how aroused he was despite actively crying you did not know. Hr opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by a small hiccup. Naruto covered his mouth and flushed a deeper red that covered deeper into his neck and pecs.

You let a smile ghost your lips as you gripped the back of the couch to balance yourself as you slipped off the rest of your clothing. Leaning back onto his legs, you reached behind yourself and unclasped your bra, the soft skin and pert nipples sparkling faintly with mixed tears and a light sheen of sweat. Naruto kissed the newly showing flesh, revelling in how well your breasts fit into his hands and how beautifully you reacted when his mouth grazed over the sensitive skin.

You gasped and rolled your hips against him. Both of you shuddered as his member dragged over your slick womanhood

He quickly moved his hands from your waist and gripped your thighs tight, stopping you from moving further "(Y/N), I don't want to do this if it's just for me-"

You leaned forward and rested your forehead against his, curling your fingers around the warm hands that held you in place "I- I want to… I want to be as close as I can to you right now." You hesitated "Is… is that okay?"

"Oh" his breath fanned across your bare chest, his face still flush from crying, a few stray tears occasionally finding their way over his cheeks, "yeah, okay"

Placing one hand on his shoulder to steady yourself and using the other to guide him to your entrance you lower yourself onto him, both of you groaning. You had been with him before, he was your boyfriend after all, but something about this time was different. You felt more full, his heat completely consuming you as you pressed as close as you physically could to him, until there were no gaps separating you. He wrapped his arms around you and held you tight, a faint whine of his name spilt from your parted lips as you fully seated yourself, thighs squeezing his hips.

"I love you so much" you threaded your fingers through his hair

"Why?" He rasped, resisting the urge in the back of his mind to buck his hips further into your warmth

"You are the kindest man" you lifted yourself and let yourself slide back down, "I've ever known-"

You continued to ride him slowly as words of praise and affection dripped from your lips like warm honey. 

You told him that nobody had a heart nearly as big as his, that he has a beautiful, sweet soul and gorgeous eyes. You told him that you loved him more than anyone in the world, that he was your hero and much more that you genuinely believed.

You moaned wantonly as his member brushed over a particularly sensitive spot, your words turned into garbled praises of sweet nothings as you began to moan and whine with less of an attempt at composure.

He shifted his hold on your hips and changed the pace from one of closenesses and shared affection into one aimed to please you. Your nails dug into his shoulders and he let out a low growl, muffling it as he latched onto your neck and began leaving a trail of purple and red flowers blooming across your delicate skin.

The coil building in your stomach was tighter than you had ever thought to be possible, your toes curled and you tilted your head to allow him more of an area to mark you.

"Naruto-" your muscles were pulled taut across your entire body, feeling it build and build into immeasurable heights despite no summit to be seen quite yet

"(Y/N)" he whispered into your shoulder, one of his hands left your side and moved between your bodies, rubbing your clit with the perfect amount of pressure. A carnal moan ripped out from your chest as your peak finally came into view, 

You gasped, sucking in shuddering breath, your voice cracking as you cried out " _I love_ _you_!"

Tears stained your face as your entire body shook through your orgasm, your mouth hanging open with no noise as your entire body was on fire. The image of Naruto gazing at you with such love and adoration stayed burned into your mind despite being blurred at the edges from your blinding orgasm

You'd never cried during sex before 

Naruto came soon after, your name on his lips as the spasming of your muscles and warmth around him sent him far over the edge.

You held each other tight as your bodies went limp, Naruto’s back against the couch was the only thing keeping you both from falling over. Your face was pressed against the side of his head as you both tried to regain your bearings. 

Naruto had come to first, lifting you off of himself slowly and continued on to picking you up and walking to your bathroom. He cleaned you up first with a damp washcloth, speaking quite words of endearment to you before taking care of himself. The two of you walked from the bathroom, his pinkie brushing yours

He walked into your bedroom first, grabbing a fresh pair of underwear from the drawer you had for him.

You bent down and scooped up his discarded shirt, contemplating for a minute before pulling the soft fabric over your head. The shirt felt cool against your skin an you hummed softly, grabbing two cups of water from the kitchen and padded to your room.

The blonde turned to you as you walked in, you handed him one of the cups with a small smile. The two of you drank and placed the cups down on your nightstand. Although the silence was comfortable, it was starting to worry you.

He laid down on the bed first and hesitantly opened his arms. He always loved cuddling and usually he would just grab you and pull you close to him, but this time he looked nervous, like he expected you to say no.

You immediately lay next to him and curled into his hold. The amount of relief that rushed over his features and the obvious relaxing of his muscles didn’t sit well with you. He should never be this nervous about cuddling. You let the situation sit for a few minutes so that the two of you could adjust and get more comfortable in each other's arms.

He kissed your forehead and pulled you closer to his chest, like you would try to leave him if he didn’t.

“Hey” You propped yourself up on your elbow and brushed some of Naruto’s hair behind his ear, idly running your fingers through his hair

He hummed in response, eyes closed

“Why didn’t you tell me about this before?”

Sighing quietly he opened his eyes and tilted his head to face you. His voice was barely above a whisper, “I don’t know. I guess I was just scared you would agree with me.”

“If it makes you feel any better Neji and Shikamaru are like brothers to me and if I’m being honest I’m not really into the whole incest thing.” you gave him a lopsided smile

He snorted, “Well, that’s a relief.”

“None of them are my type anyway. I prefer the energetic, kind, blue eyed, blonde haired” you ruffled his hair for emphasis, “strong, hokage type.”

“Damn I can’t believe I just lost to my own dad.” he deadpanned, mirth sparkling in his eyes

“Oh shut up” you slapped his chest and both of you were laughing. You felt your heart soar to see the happy shine of his eyes come back. 

“Seriously though, Naruto,” both of your expressions were significantly more serious but the sparkle stayed in his eyes. “I love you and just you, okay? No if ands or buts about it. I want to be with you for as long as you’ll have me, because you are so much more than you give yourself credit for. Nobody can compare to you.”

He let out a wet laugh, unshed tears building up in his eyes, “Come on (y/n) I _just_ stopped crying” he wiped at his eyes, “ _god i’m such a baby_.”

“Mm... no you’re not. Tears are natural. They let you know you’re alive.” you placed a hand over his heart, “They let you know how much you love someone.”

“I guess I love you a lot then.” he cupped your face

“I love you more.”

“Impossible, have you seen how much I just cried?”

You laughed and hugged his chest, your cheek resting against his warm skin. He rubbed your shoulder languidly. 

  
  
There was nowhere you would rather be, and nobody you would rather be with, than here in his arms.

The steady beating of his heart and your even breaths lulling the two of you asleep in the close embrace.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all liked as much as I liked writing it!  
> It’s July 4th and normally I would say Happy 4th or whatever but this year, from the bottom of my heart,,, fuck trump.  
> I’ll be back with some more content soon!  
> Comment some characters you’d like to see future fics with!


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